Giving Yourself a Hug

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Let me set the stage for you. You're sitting on the bus on your way to work when suddenly you feel your heart racing. Your palms are sweaty and your hands are shaking. You've had this feeling before, it's nothing new. You're surprised that it happened again so randomly. You're beginning to feel embarrassed. What if people see? You begin hyperventilating. It's happening again... you're experiencing anxiety.

What do you do in this situation? Of course, there are the classic solutions- deep breathing, positive self-talk, and grounding techniques, but have you heard of the butterfly hug?

Created by Lucina Artigas, M.A., M.T. and Ignacio Jerero, Ed.D., Ph.D., M.T., the Butterfly Hug is a great self-soothing technique that has been known to alleviate your racing heart and adrenaline rush. What’s great about the Butterfly Hug is that it can be done right in the moment and creates a sense of safety.

The Butterfly Hug is a combination of deep breathing practices, mindfulness, and physical reassurance. Begin by sitting with your back straight and engage in abdominal breathing. Use your diaphragm to guide your breathing. Remember that your abdominal area should expand when you breathe in and deflate when you breathe out. Breathe slowly, deeply, and smoothly.

1. Be mindful of the happenings of your mind. What emotions are you feeling? Where are you feeling anger in your body? Allow these emotions to pass

2. Cross your arms over your chest so that the middle finger of each hand is touching your shoulder blades and your elbows are pointed to the ground

3. Simultaneously move both hands towards your elbows

4. Simultaneously move both hands back towards your shoulders

5. Repeat until you feel relaxed

6. Continue breathing slowly and deeply, observing whatever is going through your mind and body

Try it now! See how it makes you feel even when you're not feeling anxious. Feels nice, doesn't it? It feels like being hugged by your mom (or dad) or like being swaddled in a blanket. This act of self-physical touch reaffirms to your body that everything is going to be OK. It reminds the self that you're in a safe environment and it puts you in control. Of all the physiological interventions that I have tried and heard of, this is my favourite.

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Shame and Guilt: Same but Different

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How to Dive into Your Emotions